Hetalia Oneshots
by Wolfstar96
Summary: Various oneshots for my favorite Hetalia characters and pairings! Chapter 2- America has a secret. England has found out what it is. Various ratings for each chapter ranging from K to T.
1. Finding Italy

Hello~! I have a lot of ideas for oneshots and hopefully you people will like them! The main pairings throughout these chapters will be GerIta, HREItaly, USUK, and other surprise ones! In this and other chapters some characters lines are from my friend DeathDeparture. We text. A lot. In this she was Holy Roman Empire and I was... Everyone else!

Finding Italy is rated K+ for mentioning war and implied yaoi fluff. Here it is~~

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'_Wow, so this is a computer?'_ Holy Rome thought. He had just gotten one because of the suggestions from some of his soldiers. He booted it up and did all the normal things to get a computer up and running. Once he was all set he decided to see how his 'Internet' connection was. He was browsing through some sites that helped explain the internet when something interesting came up. It was a program called 'AIM' or AOL Instant Messenger. The description said it was some sort of messenger that let you text with someone if they were online. Maybe… Maybe Italy had an account! Or somebody who knew him!

'_Yes…I will download this…And I could very possibly talk to my precious Italy!' _Holy Rome did download it. It asked him to make an account so he did that too. It took him a while to think of a good username and even then, he still didn't think it was good enough. He hit the log in button, _'All right, here I go!'_

Time: 10:30 am

*EmpireSama has logged on*

*MotherRussia has logged on*

MotherRussia: Welcome!

EmpireSama: Who am I speaking to?

MotherRussia: I am called Russia.

EmpireSama: ...?

MotherRussia: Nice to meet you, comrade.

EmpireSama: Uh... likewise Mr. Russia.

MotherRussia: And who are you?

EmpireSama: I am Holy Roman Empire.

MotherRussia: Oh, I have heard about you.

EmpireSama: Hmm, can't say I know you...Anyways, do you know where Italy is?

MotherRussia: Italy? No, I have to say I do not know his location.

EmpireSama: Damn! Do you know anyone who might?

MotherRussia: Um, Spain might. By the way, you wish to become one with Mother Russia, da?

EmpireSama: Uh... Sorry I'm my own empire and thank you, do you know how I can speak to Spain?

MotherRussia: You can by using the device you are using right now. I believe his username is TomatoBoss. And don't worry, all will become one with Mother Russia. Kolkolkolkolkolkolkolkolkol.

*MotherRussia has logged out*

Time: 11:04

'…_..Well that was slightly odd, I guess I have to wait for Spain to log in…'_

Time: 11:27

*TomatoBoss has logged in*

EmpireSama: Hello, is this Spain?

TomatoBoss: Huh, yes it is! Who are you?

EmpireSama: I am Holy Roman Empire, Russia told me you might know where Italy is…..do you?

TomatoBoss: Um, I'd have to ask Romano...

EmpireSama: Please do so, Italy is very important to me.

TomatoBoss: Alright. Romano says you should talk to Austria. Sorry, he's being kind of difficult right now.

EmpireSama: Thank you anyways. Do you know where Austria is?

TomatoBoss: You can talk to him on here, actually. I'm pretty sure his username is PianoMan.

EmpireSama: Okay, thank you very much.

TomatoBoss: You're very welcome!

*TomatoBoss has logged off*

Time: 11:51

'_So I have to wait for Austria to log in? Okay, it'll be nice to talk to him.'_

Time: 12:17

*PianoMan has logged in*

EmpireSama: Hello, is that you, Austria?

PianoMan: Yes it is. Holy Roman Empire, is that you?

EmpireSama: Yes it is, nice to hear from you again. By any chance do you know where Italy is or how I can reach him?

PianoMan: Italy is eating right now, I can go get him if you wish.

EmpireSama: PLEASE!

EmpireSama: I mean yes.

PianoMan: Haha, ok.

A few minutes passed as Holy Rome waited anxiously. This was it! After so long he was going to finally be able to talk (in a way) to his cute little Italy!

PianoMan(Italy): Holy Roman Empire!

EmpireSama: Italy!

PianoMan(Italy): I've missed you so much!

EmpireSama: I missed you too! I'm so glad to hear from you!

PianoMan(Italy): Me too!~ How have you been?

EmpireSama: I've been okay...The war was really hard on me...And you?

PianoMan(Italy): I've been okay, Austria and Hungary have been really nice to me!

EmpireSama: That's great... I've really missed you, Italy... I never stopped thinking about you during the war.

PianoMan(Italy): I've never stopped thinking about you, either~! Oh, and guess what!

EmpireSama: What my little pasta lover?

PianoMan(Italy): I grew up! It was kind of weird, though, because Austria thought I was a girl. How ridiculous is that! ^^

Holy Rome was shocked. This whole time he had thought that, by the way Italy dressed, she (he, he mentally corrected himself) was female. He gave a reply.

EmpireSama: ...Wait...Y-you're a boy?

PianoMan(Italy): Yes, of course I am!

Italy was a boy. Italy was a boy. Italy was a BOY. He quickly made an excuse to leave, he needed to think over this new information.

EmpireSama: Umm...I-I gotta go, my boss needs me, but stay in touch, okay?

PianoMan(Italy): Uh, okay! And Holy Roman Empire?

EmpireSama: Y-yes?

PianoMan(Italy): I love you! :D

*PianoMan Has logged off*

Time: 12:59

Italy had logged off before he could finish typing a good-bye. He stared at the screen at the three small words that invaded his mind. He finally tore his eyes away, smiled, and pushed the 'Log Out' button.

*EmpireSama has logged off*

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Please review if you got this far and have wonderful, Hetalia-filled days~!


	2. America's Secret

America's Secret

He hadn't meant to find out. Really he hadn't. But he had, and now America was holding his hands up to his mouth in shock and mortification that England knew. England's eyebrows were raised as he stared at his ex-colony. They stood in frozen silence for a few minutes before England burst out laughing.

"Hey! It's not funny, Arthur!" America shouted in embarrassment.

"Oh, it is definitely funny!" England retorted. The last time he had laughed this hard was when he had caught France wearing a dress!

America sputtered in rage but refused to say anything when he was this upset. After all, speaking when in a rage was how they got to this point in the first place. Instead, he opted for looking at England with a harsh glare and quietly seething. England saw the glare and his giggles died down.

"Really America? You're trying to keep that a secret? Who the bloody hell cares if you get an accent when you're angry?" England asked.

"It's not _just_ an accent, Iggy! It's…..it's a southern accent…. And I obviously _should _care since you laughed at it!" America shouted.

"Just because _I _laughed at it doesn't mean anyone else will." England retorted.

"Go away, England. I'll see you at tomorrow's meeting." America said with his bangs covering his eyes.

"Fine… See you, then." England walked out of the room and to his own. _'Really, he shouldn't worry about it… maybe I should show him that…. I got it! Tomorrow I'll get America so upset, he'll speak in the accent and see that nobody cares!'_

That night Arthur stayed up thinking about what would get America to be so angered that he would revert to his southern accent.

~~LineBreak~~

All of the nations filed into the well-known meeting room. The first one in had been Germany (like always) and the last to arrive had been England. He was tired but the 'Anger America' plan was worth it. After Germany was done talking, America jumped up and started talking about some nonsensical idea of a giant hero to help the oil spill in his gulf (Or was it technically Mexico's?). Time for the action to start.

"So this giant hero would run on hamburgers and-"

"That's so bloody stupid America. Can't you come up with at least one good idea ya wanker?" England cut in.

Everyone stopped what they were doing to stare at England. Sure he had said harsh words before but he said these with such conviction that even America picked up on the seriousness.

"B-but Iggy, I always come up with good ideas…."

"Hah! You come up the worst ideas ever! I bet your brother- what's his name again?- could come up with much better ideas!" (A/N: Hahahahaha, poor Canada) England retorted.

America could feel his anger increasing, "Leave Matt out of this! At least my cooking doesn't suck like yours!"

That hit a nerve- it always did, "Well at least _I'm _not a stupid idiot who's obsessed with heroes and heart-attack hamburgers! I'm glad you're not my colony anymore!"

That was the final straw, America could feel the southern twang approaching but was too blind with fury to notice, "I….I…. I hate you so gosh-darned much! All a' y'all can just go ta' hell fer all I care!"

The observing nations eyes widened. America froze, bracing himself for the raucous laughter that sure to follow after the awkward silence. But there was no laughter.

"See? I told you they wouldn't care about your accent. We all have accents, Alfred, not just you." England said calmly.

"You… you did that to get me ta- excuse me, _to _speak in my accent?" America asked, bewildered.

"Yes, I did. Now do you see that no one cares?"

France stood up and walked over to America and placed a hand on his shoulder, "Oui, Amerique, none of us care. I have an accent to you, no?"

America nodded.

"So obviously, you have an accent to us!" France reasoned, "It doesn't matter if it is from the southern part of you or the northern part!"

America visibly brightened and said, "Haha, I guess you're right! Now like I was saying, we should use this giant hamburger-eating hero to…"

~~LineBreak~~

Omake:

After the meeting England followed America to his room much like the previous night.

"Uh, Alfred?"

"Yeah, Artie?" America asked.

"About that stuff I said…. It's not true… Well, the hamburger-loving idiot part was true-but the part about being glad about you not being my colony….."

"It's okay! I know you were just saying things to rile me up!" America said cheerily.

England smiled, "Well, I'm glad. There's something else I want to tell you… I lo-"

"Good-night, Arthur!" America slammed the door in England's face. England stood there in stunned silence. And then he laughed. _'Still my idiotic little colony…'_

Alfred listened to the bubbling laughter coming from beyond the door. It sounded so different from the mocking laughter of last night. It was nice, in a way. 'You don't have to tell me you love me. I know you do. I love you too…'


End file.
